Deep man

I'm reading "A New Earth" by Eckhart Tolle. It's spiritual so I love it, but the psychologist in me is like "Dude, you need to back this up with some science!". Anyway, I still love it. This quote is one of my favourites. It's about how we are all playing roles and we change how we behave and how we perceive ourselves, depending on who we're dealing with. Like whether you're talking to a boss, an employee, a child, a spouse, a shop assistant or a judge. Here's the quote:

A range of conditioned patterns of behaviour come into effect between two human beings that determine the nature of the interaction. Instead of human beings, conceptual mental images are interacting with each other. The more identified people are with their respective roles, the more inauthentic the relationships become.

You have a mental image not only of who the other person is, but who you are, especially in relation to the person you are interacting with. So you are not relating with that person at all, but who you think you are is relating to who you think the other person is and vice versa. The conceptual image your mind has made of yourself is relating to its own creation, which is the conceptual image it has made of the other person. The other person’s mind has probably done the same, so every egoic interaction between two people is in reality the interaction between four conceptual mind-made identities that are ultimately fictions. It is therefore not surprising there is so much conflict in relationships. There is no true relationship.

I think there's something in that for all of us, don't you? :D

Maverick

My husband has a special affinity with Tom Cruise. He thinks they're like.. the same person or something. When he was a young baseball star, his mates nicknamed him "Mav" after the Top Gun character. He doesn't say it but you can tell he thinks that's quite cool. Tom had a wife called Nicole. Mel had a wife called Nicole. Tom got rid of his wife, Mel got rid of his. *spooky*

The thing is, there IS something very similar about the two of them. It's that they're both wankers. Remember Tom Cruise in Top Gun, with all that uber-cool strutting and hi-fiveing? Yeah well that's a bit like my husband. Not that bad, but just a bit. And it's not so much about how he behaves, but how he speaks. It makes me laugh and laugh.

At him mind you, not with him. ;)

For example, Mel never sends an email, he "fires one off". He doesn't write a letter, he "punches it out". What is with that?? When he travels overseas, he doesn't just leave, he "flies out" so he "flies out on Friday at 1600 and flies in on Saturday at 0700". I shit you not.

The latest was this week when he spent all week in Canberra preparing to be interviewed by the tenderer for a big contract they're bidding for. He worked really hard all week and was quite nervous going into the meeting. He called me on the day and I asked what time the interview was. This was his reply:

"We'll enter the building in ten minutes and the interview starts in thirty minutes. We'll be locked down for an hour and a half. Yep... it's gonna be pretty big. I'll call you as soon as I can after it's over."

Locked down??? What the fuck is that? It's just an interview,dude!

When he got home and it was all done, I told him that I actually had to stop myself from snorting over the phone. To his credit, he also laughed when I told him how much of a wanker he really is. I think I'm going to start calling him Mav....

The Pink Dress Debate

From a good friend of mine, when asked "what is the pink dress debate?" Made me laugh so hard I spat my coffee...

The pink dress debate is basically the concept that you MUST NOT EVER NO NEVER NOT EVER put a girl in a pink dress. Because then you are forcing the societal stereotypes and patriarchal subjugation upon her. You must never have ANY pink clothing, no pink sparkly ANYTHING, nothing at all in the house that is remotely "typically girly". Oh, except if you have a boy. Then you must dress him in pink, grow his hair long, and ensure that strangers will assume he is a girl, so you can politely and superiority-ly say "HE is 3 years old" and then see the shock on their face that he is a boy, even though he's wearing pink sparkly sneakers, has long blonde curls which today are in 2 piggy tails, has nail polish on, and is wearing a pink sparkly fairy dress and wings. When he does it, he's expressing his inner self and celebrating femininity. When your daughter does it, however, she is debasing herself and contributing to the patriarchal hegemony that has persecuted females for thousands of years based solely on their gender.

The NaNaNa Song

That's what Annabelle calls this. When I sing along to it, she says "No mummy! No NaNaNa! It's MY NaNaNa" and then she sings it. I am absolutely not permitted to sing her Na Na Na song. Which sucks a bit because it's one of my favourites. In fact, it's my current ringtone! :)

I'm so bright... NOT

I had a lightbulb moment at about 2am when Annabelle woke me up asking for Hairy Maclary (that's a whole other story) and I couldn't get back to sleep. I was thinking about that dream I had which foretold of a death. Remember the one? At the time I had a sense of dread and felt like there was going to be a suicide. What I couldn't work out was why my brother was in the dream, but it seemed to relate to work.

So early this morning I was thinking of the dream and how no-one died and that the feeling of dread seems to have passed, thankfully. Then I remembered that one of the residents attended a funeral on Thursday and I briefly wondered if that was the death the dream was referring to, even though that person who died is not directly connected to me at all. Then it occurred to me....

The person that died was this girl's BROTHER and he committed suicide. So right there is the brother connection, the work connection and the suicide.

I can't believe it took me so long to work it out. Duh!

Finally the Sydney photos!

Here are just a couple of snaps from our weekend in Sydney...

With our (ex) next-door neighbours - from left to right: Nathanial, Alex, Julian (front), Sophie and of course Mel, Belle and moi.

Nathanial and Annabelle. This child had no interest in playing with Annabelle before we left Sydney. In fact, the first time they really played and had a good time together was the night before we left!!! It makes me sad because they are such good mates now and love to spend time together. Having really good neighbours makes a huge difference to your quality of life I've decided. Sophie and Alex were bloody good neighbours and I think they feel the same way about us.

Beautiful Jacqui, who is 19 weeks pregnant with her own baby girl. It was lovely to catch up with her. Jacqui's a psychologist and she was a coaching client of mine. She now runs her own counselling, coaching and wellbeing centre in Sydney's inner western suburbs. She's having amazing success, getting a profile in the media and going great guns. I'm so proud of her and inspired by her....and ok, maybe just a little jealous! ;)

Having quite an indepth conversation with Aunty Sammy. I think they might have been arguing over who was going to win the AFL Grand Final due to start in half an hour!

Another dream

This one wasn't very nice. Oh, and yes I'll get to posting the photos of the trip! :)

Yesterday afternoon I was talking to a colleague at work and saying that for the first time I'm really worried that someone in the house might actually end their own life. There are some serious mental health issues with some of the residents there at the moment and she (my colleague) agreed that she was concerned about the same thing. We normally have some really complex clients there but for me, this is more of a creepy vibe, or a sense of impending doom.

So anyway, last night I was lying in bed and I suddenly remembered a dream I'd had the night before last. I don't know why I'd forgotten it, but it suddenly came back to me. In the dream, I'd been at this place which was "work" (it wasn't my actual work but you know how it is in dreams...) and I was with a person who I think was my brother. A man was sitting down talking to someone when he suddenly turned to me and said he had a message. He was like a psychic guy and he said he'd been visited by an angel and asked to tell me something. Then I saw a woman standing next to him with long blonde hair. She looked very pale and spooky. I asked him if that's what the angel looked like and he said yes, her hair is white and I was like "wow I can see her". So he said she wanted to tell me that someone was going to die. He said she could see the word "Walker" printed on the forehead of the person next to me. "Walker" in this case referred to "walking dead". :-0

What is worrying me now is that if the dream was prophetic, why was my brother in it? And if it was really my brother, why were we at my work? So I don't know what the dream means or if it means anything at all, but considering some of the stuff I've been feeling at work, the dream suddenly felt horribly real. I couldn't sleep at all last night, going over all the details of it in my head. Or maybe the dream is what made me feel creepy. I really don't know.

I decided all I can do is send everyone white light and hope for the best. eek.